ABSTRACT
My inability to help a significant number of couples using this bare-bones model led me to add modifications and upgrades drawn from my work and from the work of others in the field. The most important upgrade has been to focus early and explicitly on the couple’s interpersonal process, their negative interaction cycle. In most cases, this maladaptive dance, in which couples do all the wrong things and gradually escalate to increasing levels of distress and incapacity, must be addressed before specific problems (with finances, children, or sex) can be tackled. Other important upgrades include unpacking the pathological dance by focusing on psychodynamics; working toward acceptance and forgiveness; teaching communication, emotion regulation, and problem-solving skills; and increasing positive couple experiences.
