ABSTRACT
In recent years, sociologists have pointed to many transformations in personal life. We have heard quite a bit about the "questioning of tradition," the "redefinition of gender," the "reworking of relationships," or the "transformation of intimacy" and so on. Some sociologists have understood changes in private life in terms of an increase in "reflexivity" (see Giddens 1991, 1992; Beck and Beck-Gernsheim 1995; Swidler 2001: Weeks 1995; Weeks, Heaphy and Donovan 2001). Generally speaking, reflexivity means that, in a time of change and heightened social diversity, people no longer are able unconsciously to rely on traditions and customs to determine how they live. Applied tc intimacy and sexuality, people are thrown back upon themselves to define theii relationships and their identities within them. Crudely put, we must make decisions foi ourselves once ingrained institutions and traditions are questioned, or once it becomes harder to say, "That's just the way the world is."
